I woke up Tuesday morning to the news that a recent study discovered a correlation between cat scans and cancer.... Wait a minute! They discovered that a machine that blasts you with radiation ups the risk for cancer?

Isn't that rather obvious?

Also they had a story on the early show about a recall prompted by a danger posed by Roman blinds to kids. Evidently kids can use the drawstrings to choke themselves. To demonstrate this they put a doll in the most ungodly (Excuse the euphemism) position and twisted it.

I remember thinking to myself "But if we don't let these idiot kids kill themselves they'll grow up to be shocked to learn that a machine that uses radiation increases the risks of cancer!"

Don't get me wrong I understand kids get into the damnedest situations, but my kids all had roman blind in their rooms at one point or another and never got even close to the position this "expert" had the doll in.

And mine weren't even the sharpest tools in the shed!

Barack Obama is the Antichrist, but George W Bush is a deeply religious man.

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

"Standing Tall for America" means firing your workers and moving their jobs to India.

"Patriotism" means moving millions of dollars from the US into Swiss accounts so that you don't have to pay taxes to the U.S..

A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

When Bill Clinton criticized George W Bush it was demeaning to the presidency, and when Dick Cheney criticizes Barack Obama he's excercizing freedom of speech.

Two gay guys getting married will ruin marriage, but a 50% devorce rate among evangelicals won't.

Insurance companies have the interests of the public at heart, and calling Dwarfism a pre-existing condition so that you can deny health coverage to a whole group of people based on a disability, is not discrimination.

A foregner throwing a shoe at a US president in a foreign country is an outrage, A US representative interupting a state of the union in the US congress shouting "Liar, liar" is fine.

When Jeremiah Wright said "God Damn America" that was hateful. But when Jerry Falwell said "AIDS is God's wrath upon homosexuals" that was loving.

When a fetus is in the womb it's life is sacred, but 18 years later when it accidently kills a clerk during a botched robbery, it deserves the death peanalty.

Everyone deserves to see Barack Obama's birth certificate, but George W Bush's reserve activation records are no one's business.

If Condoms are kept out of schools teens wont have sex.

A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits, denying proper armor, and combat pay.

For the Democrats list click on this link~ http://justin-debin.xanga.com/718319614/what-democrats-believe/